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Four Poems (cont.)
By Jim Macaulay

I was writing about the end of the world
When a friend said, Bah humbug!
It's the middle of winter,
Been raining for a solid week
[perhaps he should have said "liquid" week]
Say something to cheer me up.
We'll all soon be dead, I said, to give him cheer.
Oh! fine that's a real comfort.

Espying an old calendar in a corner,
I saw kittens, so I suggested:-
Paws without claws,
Your sofa's safe.
Then in that vein,
Dogs without hairs, who never poo.
Doing without forgetting the things to do.
Letters without writing, oh! where is my pen?
Meals without cooking, now and then.
Dishes without washing, leave nothing to break.

Need I go on?
Income without tax, if offered I'd take
Ah, here's a thought.
Africa without disaster, aye the world would be flat.
Joints without ache, where the pain makes you shout.
Now these are all things to do without.

So, I thought what would be good to add?
Then it occurred to me
That I already had everything
What I should need is less.
Would that make us happy?
Fewer laws, fewer rules
Fewer folks needing drugs.
Fewer words ending in "ness".

Oldness,
Rudeness,
Aloneness,
Bitterness,
Anxiousness,
Droopiness,
Dizziness,
Baldness,
Oneness.

Fine he said, tell me about the end of the world.

© Jim Macaulay

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